Day 2, continued

[kentucky_mcgiygas]

[ Around lunchtime, the tablets and screens located all around the studio turn on, in the way that they always do when the mascots have something to announce. Unusually, however, there is no music, no fanfare; the camera is out of focus, and Ronald doesn’t even seem to be looking at it. Instead, he's turned to King, ]

—supposed to be 40! What the McFuck are you doing? Can you even count?

[ The King stares. ]

You gave out 41! The Colonel would never screw up like that!

[ The King stares. ]

And what's this, "Quarter Pounder or Whopper" garbage? Those aren't equivalent burgers, you fake-grill-line-adding piece of shit! I'd better not see this referencing this in your next ad campaign!

[ The King offers a Whopper. Ronald McDonald smacks it out of his hand. He starts to yell again, but cuts himself off, turning his head toward the camera. ]

—Are we rolling!? Grimace, kill the feed!

[ The screens switch off. ]

((lol I goofed, there are actually 41 votes to go around.

Vote here!
Private posts
Contestant Roster & Status
Game navigation))

Comments

[jinglebros]

Mom please.

[meatitfeedson]

It's too late to stop now.

[Why didn't McCafe exist in the 80s so I could make a latte pun too]

We're going full dad joke and there's nothing you can do.

[jinglebros]

You're not my dad!

[ ... ]

[meatitfeedson]

You don't know that.

[jinglebros]

[ Pause, then in a quiet, dramatic voice: ]

Daddy?

[meatitfeedson]

That's right, son. It's me. Come give me a hug - just, ignore my breasts. It happens when you get to my age.

I ACCIDENTALLY HIT GRANT ACCESS AGAIN GEE I JUST GIVE UP AND GIVE IT TO YOU

[jinglebros]

Wow, I hope I grow breasts so fantastic when I hit your age!

GUESS THAT'S JUST HOW IT IS NOW

[meatitfeedson]

[Her husband's got pretty good titties going on tbh]

Only if you work hard. Eating the stuff here might not hurt either.

[She's just gonna push her chest out to show off more with her hands on her hips because her tits are great and she's not afraid to show it.]

WE ARE DESTINED TO BE TOGETHER

[jinglebros]

Eww, that's what I have to do? I've been making my own food to get by.

[ He tries his very best to keep his gaze focused on her face but it's obvious it's a struggle. ]

holds you close

[meatitfeedson]

Did you find anything worthwhile for ingredients...

[Because to be honest...she hasn't eaten anything yet. And she knows she should before it gets out of hand, but...]

<3

[jinglebros]

The kitchen's pretty well stocked up, you just have to know how to work with what we've got.

I had to work with all sorts of shitty food as a kid, I learned quick. This is just a blast from the past for me.

[meatitfeedson]

Well, at least I'm used to cooking for a little kid...

[But also she has hangups. Hangups that should probably be classified as an eating disorder really, but she's not going to be the one to say it. It isn't current, but it's a slippery slope.]

We should all have a meal together, maybe we could manage to make something nice.

[jinglebros]

Have you had anything nice to eat since you got here? Maybe I can make you something nice.

[ He's a little too eager to impress the mom. He has no idea about any inner issues. ]

[meatitfeedson]

[He really wants to join the mom crew, doesn't he.]

Honestly? Nothing at all. Well, besides a french fry for that challenge. But it's the mother's job to make dinner, after all.

[jinglebros]

[ Santa looks aghast. ]

You need to eat before you faint! Nobody wants you hurt around here!

[meatitfeedson]

[She waves a hand, no big deal.]

I'm not about to faint, it's only been a day. There's just so much going on, you know? I wanted to check out the kitchen anyway though, do you want to come with me?

[jinglebros]

I mean, I guess you can go up to five days, so - alright. Promise me you'll drink something at least?

[ He's suspicious but he's not going to push. He knows the hazards of pushing about feelings with ladies. ]

You lead, I'll follow.

[meatitfeedson]

I've had plenty to drink, don't worry.

[She nods, thinking of where it is before heading in that direction.]

Actually my mother was really strict, so fasting entirely would be fine too, but I'd certainly rather not.

[jinglebros]

It might be something you got used to, but it's not fine. The body kicks into starvation mode.

[ He follows along. ]

[meatitfeedson]

[She shrugs.] Well of course.

So you looked after your sister and did the cooking and everything? That's pretty impressive for a boy especially, most I know would be hopeless. I bet my step-son wouldn't even know how to make instant noodles.

[jinglebros]

It took me awhile to work out the cooking. We had a lot of burnt shit for awhile. Ate a lot of garbage, too. [ He's.... being literal here, but he's not going to specify. He'll be glad if she doesn't take the phrase at face value, he's already regretting saying it. Shitty memories of digging food out of back alleys of restaurants are bubbling up and he's got much less good humour on his face than he did before. ]

[meatitfeedson]

[Whether or not she takes it entirely literal, there's still something telling about it. He did say they were extremely poor.]

...And how are you doing now? If you need anything, you'll tell me won't you?

[jinglebros]

I'll make you a deal - you tell me if you need anything, and I'll do the same.

[meatitfeedson]

[She has to laugh - that's fair enough really.]

If you're going to twist my arm like that. Then it's a deal.

[jinglebros]

Good. Then it's settled.

[ He finally smiles again. ]